簡單英語幽默笑話
笑話是日常生活中人們消遣娛樂的一種常見語言現象,其目的在于在會話過程中傳遞和激發幽默感。簡單英語幽默笑話一:Where It Should Be Plugged
A mother is very good at using every chance to educate his son, who was only three years old. One day, she took a plug and said to her son, " Look, there are two pieces of copper, so it must be plugged in a place where there are two holes. Where do you think it should be plugged?" She waited for an answer expectfully .
"Plug in nose." is the answer.
一位母親十分善于利用每一個機會對孩子進行教育。她的.兒子只有三歲。一天,她拿著一個插頭對兒子說:“看,這里有兩個銅片,那它一定要插在有兩個孔的地方。你說它應該插在哪兒呢?”母親期待著兒子的回答。
“插在鼻子里!”兒子回答說。
簡單英語幽默笑話二:問問你自己的吧
Ask Your OwnIt was a cold,raw day at Washington.Champ Clark was discussing the gamins of the cities with an English visitor.The latter expatiated on the wit of the London type of the genius.Clark declared that if the Englishman were to ask any Washington street urchin any question,the urchin would make anaptreply.They sallied forth. “What time is it,Bub?They tell me you can tell time by your nose,”said the visitor to the first newsboy they met. “Ask your own,mister,mine ain't run nin’,”was the reply.
這是華盛頓的一個陰冷天。錢普·克拉克正和一個來訪的英國人討論城市的流浪兒,英國人詳細地敘述著倫敦式天才的機智。克拉克宣稱,要是對方向華盛頓街上任何一個兒童提任何問題,那孩子都會對答如流。他們便出發了。 “什么時候了,小兄弟?人們說你能用鼻子報時。” 回答是:“先生,問問你自己的吧,的不在走呢。”
簡單英語幽默笑話三:What Was It She Wanted?
A store manager heard a clerk tell a customer.“No,ma’am, we haven't had any for a while, and it doesn't look asif we'll be getting soon.” Horrified,the manager came runningover to the customer and said,“Of course, we'll have somesoon, We placed an order last week.” Then the manager drewthe clerk aside:“Never, never, never say we are out of anything—say we've got it on order and it's coming. Now whatwas it she wanted?” “Rain.” said the clerk.
一個商店經理聽見一個店員對顧客說:“不,夫人,這會兒沒有,一時半會兒看來也不會有。”經理驚恐萬分地跑到顧客跟前說:“當然,馬上就會有的。我們上周訂了貨。”然后經理把店員拉到一邊:“千萬,千萬,千萬不要說我們沒有什么——說我們已經訂了貨,貨馬上就到。現在你說她要買什么?” “雨,”店員說。
簡單英語幽默笑話四:Older Goats in America美國老羊
A group of Americans were traveling by tour bus through Holland. As they stopped at a cheese farm, a young guide led them through the process of cheese making, explaining that goats' milk was used.
She showed the group a lovely hillside where many goats were grazing. These, she explained, were the older goats put out to pasture when they no longer produced. She then asked, "What do you do with your older goats in America?"
A spry old gentleman answered, "They send us on bus tours!"
一群美國人乘長途汽車在荷蘭旅游。他們在一個奶酪場停下來。一位年輕的導游帶他們參觀了奶酪制作的全過程,解釋說用的是羊奶。 她指給這群人一個美麗的山坡,山坡上許多羊在吃草。對這些,她解釋說,是放逐草地的老羊,它們已不能再產奶。她然后問道:“在美國你們怎樣處理老羊呢?”
一位活潑的老紳士回答說:“他們讓我們乘車旅行!”
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